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  • Man insulates himself with body fat for winter but wife thought he was going to insulation house for winter.
  • Husband tells wife he will rake leave when they all fall but he's stapled the leaves to the tree.
  • Pavlov's dogs drool whenever the downstairs neighbor's telephone rings.
  • A ghost accidentally washes another ghost with a bunch of clothes
  • An amusement park for ghosts has an unhaunted house ride.
  • A mom complains that a kid is trashing her home, but outside everyone is polluting the earth.
  • A bat doesn't know what has been happening cause its been living outside the cave.
  • Ghosts use irons as an anti-aging product.
  • A vampire and mummy trade spaces.
  • A dog scratches a record like a DJ would.
  • Landscapers make your lawn the best in the neighborhood by making others' lawns look worse.
  • A feline parody on a famous phrase 'don't count your chickens before they hatch'.