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  • Kangaroos have hot pockets as their comfort food.
  • A man tells legends after drinking too much bourbon.
  • A slice of bread has a buttered half.
  • A woman flosses her keyboard because she has too many crumbs from snacks in there.
  • Humpty Dumpty realizes he has nothing to fall back on when his career ends.
  • This man is ridden with guilt for everything he does.
  • A cat wants her mother to get double stuff Orioles instead of single stuffs.
  • A turkey thinks he survived the holidays, but is about to die.
  • Miss Muffet goes in for liposuction.
  • A man discovers original flavor Snackos are pig feet flavor.
  • A dog has a New Years hangover, but it feels like seven of them.
  • A GPS system to locate a bottle opener.