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  • Insulted waiter spits in food and bird recalls food like mother made.
  • To fly, a dog thinks happy thoughts about giving the cat a swirlie.
  • Fish advising other fish about ice fishing season.
  • A baby sticks to a formula, just like TV execs.
  • Some nursery rhymes updated for the modern era.
  • The new dog food tastes meatier, but who's going to taste it'
  • Godzilla throws Orville Redenbacher into his mouth like a piece of popcorn.
  • Play on the saying Murphy's Law with the coleslaw spilling.
  • People wear visors to protect from flying corks on New Year's.
  • Two cats order Chuck E Chees pizza, hoping to find pieces of Chuck E. the mouse on it.
  • A dog is hungry and eats all of the Christmas cookies left for Santa, but the kids think it's Santa.
  • Santa gets a note on Christmas Eve if he wants to add a cookie to his system like the Internet.