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  • A mom coconut complains that she always has to feed her child even though her husband has just as much milk
  • A hammer head shark and a swordfish have a baby fish that's a Swiss Army knife.
  • A man accidentally proposes to his girlfriend when someone drops their ring in her chicken fingers.
  • Pinocchio said he was sober, but afterwards he couldn't touch the tip of his nose.
  • Piranha is reminded not to chew his food thoroughly.
  • A dog runs a food blog.
  • A glass challenges a dribble glass to a game of basketball.
  • Birds push their son Humpty Dumpty to fly while he's still an egg.
  • Old Pillsbury Doughboys retire to the Home for the Day Old.
  • A raindrop turns into a snowflake when her boyfriend says something rude.
  • Trans fat comes from transgender pigs.
  • A woman dumps her drinks in the fish tank, giving them a hangover.