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  • The Big Bad Wolf breaks his natural diet when he eats Little Red Riding Hood's grandma.
  • Mark updates nursery rhymes for the modern age.
  • Scientists will remove 90% of suffering and distress from humankind by getting rid of the lawyer gene.
  • The Pillsbury Dough Boy is on an IV of BHT.
  • A professor is trying to figure out what should go in the blank of "Running around like a ____ with its head cut off."
  • Pavlov's dog keeps drooling as he gets older.
  • A geneticist switches from DNA to jean splicing when his pants split at the butt.
  • A dog goes on a patch so he'll stop being addicted to chasing cars.
  • Frankenstein calls IT to get help putting in his monster's brain because they know how to install memory.
  • Two men stranded in the desert argue about whether a glass is half full of half empty, but it evaporates before they can decide.
  • UFOs try to construct the perfect Earthling using DNA from powerful and popular people, but the DNA they collected is all from ugly or stupid famous people.
  • Michael Jackson, the Pillsbury Dough Boy, and Mickey Mouse inhale helium and their voices get stuck at a high pitch.