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  • A woman's cat latches onto her hand and gets stuck when she tries to give it a belly rub.
  • Surgeons check to see if people with cold hands have warm hearts.
  • A woman gets an ultrasound and her unborn child is holding a sign that says "No more chili."
  • A woman hearing her son was in an accident is scared he's dead, but instead is horrified to hear he was wearing dirty underwear.
  • A surgeon decides he can't allow flash photography in the operating room any more.
  • A snake tries to give a party blower mouth-to-mouth.
  • One Godzilla offers another one some halls for his cold.
  • A cat in heaven says he should have been suspicious about being put to sleep, because he never needed help sleeping.
  • Godzilla needs to stop eating Mercury cars.
  • A cat hasn't slept in two hours, so he goes to therapy.
  • Frankenstein's monster has to go to the ER for stitches and is nervous, even though he's sewn together.
  • A jar of peanut butter's husband was smooth when she married him, but now he's chunky.