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  • The weasel from Pop Goes the Weasel has an open casket funeral.
  • The man who invented heat-seeking missiles was inspired by his cats.
  • A dog warns a puppy that he'll never view thermometers the same way again after the vet.
  • A piece of grass gets bitten by a horse, but it'll be okay because it was only grazed.
  • An invention we could really use is a mute button for can openers we can use when opening cans of pet food.
  • A mad scientist's time machine isn't Y2K compatible.
  • Godzilla spoons people from the Sugar Bowl into his coffee.
  • A dog's wife catches him looking at filth on the internet.
  • Snoopy buys ground chuck with a pattern like Charlie Brown's sweater.
  • Desperate tech support people use monkeys to eat bugs out of computers.
  • Dogs say corny things to each other.
  • Dogs visit the canine self-help section.