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  • Cats do sleep deprivation research, but they have to let their subject out after three hours.
  • A cop arrests a cat burglar by biting the scruff of his neck.
  • A cat wishes for a genie to make a snake eat his family's dog.
  • A cat's latest work is a picture called "What's Left of the Curtains."
  • Cats bite a man's face because he ate a tuna sandwich.
  • A cat teacher tells the students to hiss at the new kid in class until they get used to her.
  • A man asks a woman with dozens of cats if she's considered calling an exterminator.
  • Cats borrow books from a self-help section in a library.
  • A cat tells his friend that he has to stop committing so many crimes because he's already on his fifth life sentence.
  • Cat hell includes options such as kids with doll clothes, silent can openers, and a room of rocking chairs.
  • Dogs agree to live in a dog-eat-cat world instead of a dog-eat-dog world.
  • A bird dies because it thinks a cat's collar bell sounds sweet.