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  • A paint can sees a psychiatrist because it wants to be thinner.
  • Today is the first day of this cat's sixth life.
  • Picard is concerned about the expanding base Data has.
  • A boy's dog ate his homework for Nutrition class.
  • A snow woman grieves over her husband, who melted because of too much salt.
  • A celebrity gossip magazine writes about Christmas themes.
  • A trainer can improve a man's fat index, but not his phat index.
  • Ace Sausages hands out sunglasses on its tour to protect people's appetites.
  • Regular people do extreme sports like driving with a car full of balloons and eating leftovers from the back of the fridge.
  • The little mermaid decides to get her tail back when she starts getting cellulite.
  • A pair of pants asks her boyfriend if the person wearing her makes her look fat.
  • The children's version of Candy Land has characters like Princess Lolly, but the adult version has ones like M.T. Calories, Colossal Waist, and Dental Bill.