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  • A spider wants to check how many hits its web site got.
  • A dog smells things with virtual reality.
  • Two boys hack Santa's computer to put themselves on the nice list and their sister on the naughty list.
  • A man has been spending too much time working on his website, so he thinks it will be easy to wallpaper his house.
  • A man gets a ruptured spleen phone and a Sports' Most Violent Injuries tape with his subscription to Sports Illustrated.
  • A man talks the way he chatted online, with typos.
  • A woman's online lover accidentally wrote someone else's username.
  • A chicken downloads pictures of plucked chickens online.
  • Cartoon characters get caught in a thicket of cartoon water marks.
  • A cat emails its owner to get let into the house.
  • A dad tells his daughter to sit farther back from the TV while he's close to his computer screen.
  • The insects a fly and a butterfly don't like the World Wide Web or the 'Net.