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  • A dog leaves her husband and tells her she faked every time she wagged her tail.
  • Cats think the power button on the answering machine is marked that because turning it off gives them power.
  • A homeless cat wants to pee on the rug and claw the furniture of a woman who feeds it.
  • A cat thinks chocolate mousse is a very well-blended chocolate mouse.
  • A dog chained outside gets resentful when his owner hums 'Unchained Melody.'
  • A cat is interested in watching The Big Sleep.
  • A cat knocks over a vase so it can steal a bite of its owner's turkey.
  • A man calls for his dog, Fat Moron Pig, and gets beat up.
  • A cat knocks bacon grease onto the rug just as its owner notices an advertisement for a rug sale.
  • A lobster thinks a couple is adopting her and her friend, but really they're about to get eaten.
  • A cat always looks at a woman's new purchases because it wants to shed on them.
  • The cartoon lists phrases that never caught on.