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  • The fire department won't rescue a cat from a tree, so its owner sets the tree on fire.
  • A female cat performs a Home Hairball Test to check if her husband is cheating on her.
  • Scientists bio-engineer a diamond dog to be everyone's best friend.
  • A cat defends herself against unwanted advances with a can that blows in other cats' faces.
  • The director threatens to buy a squirt gun backstage at Cats.
  • A man finds a dog in a supermarket parking lot, and the dog has one foot that goes the wrong direction.
  • A dog stockpiled toilets for Y2K so his family wouldn't get thirsty no matter what happened.
  • A cat therapist tries to hypnotize his patient, but the patient bats at the pendulum instead.
  • A cat tears down a Christmas tree because he got a present of catnip.
  • Cats go through a woman's purse.
  • A cat has to keep reindeer from pooping in his litter box at Christmas.
  • Low ash cat food is made by employees who don't smoke.