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  • A dog doesn't like having to download and print a newspaper because it takes too long to make somewhere to poop.
  • Dogs get creepy phone calls that are just heavy purring.
  • Regular people do extreme sports like driving with a car full of balloons and eating leftovers from the back of the fridge.
  • Cat recycling has three bins: feathers, tiny bones, and beaks.
  • Every day is independence day for cats.
  • A cat sells a dog on ebay.
  • A man threatens to give his cat the belt if he doesn't get off the bed, and then the cat chews on the belt while the man sleeps in the bed.
  • A dentist spends all week pulling canines, and the weekend with his canines pulling him.
  • A dog prepares to eat the mailman with a package of Mailman Helper.
  • A diagram of a cat's brain.
  • The Guest-Be-Gone air circulator fills the room with the smell of a man's cat litter.
  • A dog plays a video game where you chase your own tail.