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  • Humpty Dumpty is egg salad in his salad days.
  • Ants throw an Under the Hill theme party for their friend.
  • The Justice Department suspects Microsoft of taking kickbacks from The Hair Club.
  • A camera tells his wife to stop complaining about her hot flashes.
  • A cat eats at a restaurant with early bird specials.
  • When the Rice Krispies brothers get old, their joints snap, crackle, and pop.
  • Gumby uses wrinkle cream to get rid of stretch marks when he gets old.
  • Fred Astaire rolls along the ceiling in his wheelchair.
  • Birds' nests are celebrities' bad wigs.
  • Don King starts losing his hair and attempts a combover.
  • A woman opens a package of sourdough dough and finds an irritable old Pillsbury Dough Boy inside.
  • The Hair Club for Men stops hiring ex-umpires because they shout too loudly.