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  • A woman's hot flashes mean her heating bills are cheaper.
  • Woodpeckers retire to Balsa Acres.
  • A 50-year-old wizard's most difficult problem is peeing.
  • The old lady who lives in a shoe daydreams that her shoe is a rollerskate.
  • A godzilla complains that the mummy wraps he ordered don't look fresh.
  • A mummy texts while having a conversation.
  • A cat tells a campfire story about how his owner wouldn't refill his bowl.
  • A man grows very old on a never-ending non-stop train ride.
  • A peacock can't get his tail to fan out and might take pills to fix it.
  • Bifocals aren't enough for a fly -- he needs millifocals.
  • The cartoonist lets his family come up with ideas for his father's day cartoon.
  • The grim reaper nearly kills the wrong person because he's distracted by his phone.