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A sandwich hates picnics because they make him antsy.
A dog is annoyed that his mistress can dig and fertilize the garden, but he can't.
A man's flip-flops don't know what direction they want to go.
The water at the beach makes a man have to use the bathroom, but the sand makes his cat have to go too.
Chickens know when to turn over while tanning because they have pop-up thermometers.
A sofa is sick because it has spring fever.
A lawyer tries to argue for a shorter winter.
Bears eating Santa use Santa's Helper.
A man's drink has snowman parts in it.
A snow plough shaves off half of a snowman's body.
A worm likes living on a baseball field, except for the wet tobacco rain.
The last leaf on a tree wonders if the other leaves left because of his bad breath.
