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  • Single wine glass at bar tells martini margarita is cute but can’t get past salt flake dandruff flaw dating deal breaker.
  • Exercising sphere shaped Earth’s belly crunches, treadmill run & push up workout effort fails to flatten round body.
  • Flattened cartoon Simpsons Homer squished for Jewish holiday matzo bread dough catchphrase.
  • Colorful decorated Easter eggs crowd shocked by naked blank egg streaking outdoors public nudity surprise.
  • Expired older Humpty Dumpty apologizes to surprised lover for disappointing sexual performance with past best by dates excuse.
  • Easter holiday texts autocorrected jelly beans aliens, basset hound basket, weeping candy Peeps & relaxed rabbit drone egg deliveries.
  • Rabbit counselor asks Easter bunnies couple in therapist’s office if tired of walking on eggshells literally.
  • Colored Easter egg in casket tells mixed-up mourner eggs at church funeral service he’s dyed not died.
  • Silly dog bluffs owner not in mood to sleep on bed but playfully jumps up joking April Fool’s!
  • Happy cat pounces on lost toys hidden under sofa as spring cleaning owners rearrange home’s living room furniture.
  • Frustrated Saint Patrick failed driving slow snails out of Ireland so forces faster snakes instead.
  • Shocked leprechaun’s pot of gold stolen by slow St. Patrick’s Day ninja sloth thief dressed in expensive jewels & bling.