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  • A shark helps a man who lost his glasses in the ocean.
  • The big bad wolf blows his own house down because he sneezed.
  • A pig on a beach tells the bacon next to it that it should have worn sunscreen.
  • A woman says she's trying to avoid red meat, but all the meat at the barbecue is burned black.
  • A man without health insurance goes to a beach littered with needles and pill bottles to feel better.
  • A mosquito air captain warns everyone about turbulence as they approach 10,000 people's feet.
  • A woman looks for buns of steel at the beach by scanning people's butts with a metal detector.
  • Everyone runs away from a man who's been sucking in his belly for 45 minutes because it's about to explode.
  • A shark gets mad at his girlfriend because she wants to leave him for another shark who has a swimmer's body.
  • Product failures chunky pulp milk, caffeinated baby formula, salty Dr Pepper soda, Lee Press-On nose hair, sugar sweet toothpaste, stinky tuna Chicken of the Sea fish perfume, spicy cajun Preparation-H, gross leftover parts chicken soup, vegetable flavor popsicles & feline sleeping pills for insomniac cats.
  • A snowman's mom nags him to wear a hat to keep his head cold.
  • A snow man near a nuclear plant has two heads.