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  • Columbus pretends he has a flat stomach on the beach, when it's really round.
  • A man plays a tape of pool sounds to make his neighbors think he has a pool.
  • A man disappears into his Bermuda Triangle Shorts.
  • A grill takes an anti-inflammatory, then won't ignite.
  • A woman needs something to check the pP level of her pool.
  • Rush Limbaugh stays off the beaches because he'd have to use sunscreen liberally.
  • A doctor uses garden gnomes as part of his G. Gnome research.
  • A snowman gets glass eyes and dentures.
  • Snowmen watch Bugs Bunny eat a carrot in a horror movie.
  • A dog gives a snowman yellow highlights.
  • Everyday is Groundhog Day at the sausage factory.
  • A snow woman grieves over her husband, who melted because of too much salt.