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  • Man realizes overweight dog stuck in dog door makes home less drafty.
  • Book idea on dogs using selective eating hits roadblock.
  • Man wrongly asks woman when she's expecting and tries to save it by insulting clothes instead.
  • Vanity, gluttony, envy, and bankruptcy car license plates.
  • The Chamber of Commerce is torture chamber for money.
  • Fishermen get photos of fish pumped with air to enhance the appearance of their catch.
  • A whole class of envelopes frustrate a yoga instructor as they are all marked "do not bend."
  • To get accepted on dating web site, men must take long-walk-on-the-beach test.
  • Man with large belly eyes new slant-top pants.
  • Fat-free ice cream maker sponsors verdict with their guilt slogan.
  • Kids find only wrappers in pinata as squirrel ate all the candy.
  • Man's diet fails as he eats foods that sound thin but aren't.