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  • A librarian wants her daughter returned by 9, or she'll start charging her date nickel fines.
  • Mrs. Potatohead wears boy's facial features to go to the car repair shop.
  • A coffee cup goes into a store with bottomless cups of coffee.
  • A cubic zirconia hits on girl gems at a bar.
  • Smokey Bear's wife puts up a sign saying her and her husband's bedroom is a smokey-free environment.
  • A woman's recipe has cat hair in it because she owns so many cats.
  • A woman likes that a man is there for her, but not that he's there with her.
  • Dorothy gets tired of being single and grabs the scarecrow's butt.
  • A woman gets her boyfriend's machine whenever she calls, so she goes on a date with it.
  • The Pillsbury Dough Boy looks at the centerfold of Play Dough Magazine.
  • Praying mantis bumper stickers have jokes about eating other mantises.
  • How cartoon characters' careers ended.