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  • Lonely man sitting on couch with cat asks if it loves him and it jumps up leaving a valentine heart of shed hair on his shirt.
  • Groundhogs in cinema are scared by film projector casting their shadows on screen.
  • Sweater congratulates other on trophy case of ugly sweaters contest awards.
  • One Zilla monster asks another eating a chocolate factory if it broke it’s New Year’s Resolution already.
  • Woman asks man why he’s wearing 2018 glasses but he likes them better because he has three eyes.
  • Santa using laptop rates kids’ cookies online from one to five stars.
  • Dog wants more presents from Santa to destroy after ripping up gift wrap making a large mess.
  • Santa flying sleigh checks cellphone’s twisting and turning GPS map for directions to deliver toys.
  • Rudolph was sick so Santa called on Rashy the Red Butt Reindeer to guide his sleigh.
  • Woman checks smartphone app to see how much man spent on her Christmas gifts.
  • Santa is annoyed to find note from cable company service technician that they missed him on the one day that he’s out.
  • Little Drummer Boy dramatically complains that it’s too hard to play drum in manger scene.