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  • Man in suit at store mirror shopping is told by saleswoman his suit accentuates his wallet.
  • Employee does a bad job stacking Tetris game on computer game shelf.
  • Without legal will, turkeys must use James' wishbone to determine the turkey's inheritance.
  • Cartoonist takes Father's Day off much like Bill Keane.
  • A woman doing her taxes tries to count a pity date as a charitable contribution.
  • Ozzy Osbourne's accountant tells him his family's income is tied up in a swear jar.
  • Company decides to switch from nickel and diming to quarter and dollaring.
  • A man complains that the bank is gerbil and hamstering him to death.
  • A man quits his modeling job before fully vested.
  • A researcher can't lose his grant because he's accidentally made himself half beaver and needs money to turn back.
  • A man who got his bookkeeping system upgraded to software tries to pay the contractor on paper.
  • People wait until 5 in the morning on New Year's because they don't realize the clock is out of batteries.