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  • Cop asks cat to identify pet owner who gave it dry food in police line up.
  • Suspicious fruit asks returning husband why he smells like pumpkin spice.
  • Bug wife reminds cheating husband about time found a tick on him.
  • Fruit cops say peach being painfully waxed is brave to go undercover as nectarine.
  • Cops interrogating house suspect show building footprint blueprint evidence found at crime scene.
  • Tic-tac-toe grids don’t know if grid lying on floor with X eyes and O mouth is dead or playing games.
  • A press-on nail truck and a chalkboard truck have an accident, making a horrible noise.
  • English majors on the jury interpret a double negative as a confession.
  • Doctor reads that patient is supposed to go to phlebotomy before brain surgeon performs lobotomy by mistake.
  • Cake watches scary true crimes birthday cake killer documentary on television.
  • Dishonest mechanic outside auto body repair garage pays grocery cart bribe to damage cars in parking lot.
  • Dog eats lawn as medicine then enjoys rolling in grass recreationally for fun.