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  • Hors d'oeuvre dining at restaurant asks nacho date how long it’s been covered in cheese.
  • Iphone in bed prefers scroll phone husband’s screen to Brad Pitt picture before sex.
  • Monkey date apologizes fur infested in head lice but girlfriend loves he brought lunch.
  • Orange on laptop browses O.J. OKCupid parody online fruit dates profile photos.
  • Ironic sleazy guy at bar leering at ladies personality easier to read than indecipherable writing tattooed man.
  • Flirting cellphone hits on smartphone crush at bar, says can’t stop looking at it.
  • Married Sasquatch husband on cellphone thinks insulting big fool text isn’t autocorrected.
  • Snowman flirts with snow lady at bar with compatible water sign zodiac astrology pick-up lines.
  • Cat parents can only afford one Christmas toy gift but grateful kitten kids love sharing fun box, ribbon & wrapping paper best.
  • Mrs. Claus asks forgetful Santa home from global Christmas toy delivery if remembered switch off smartphone roaming.
  • Surprised Christmas light bulbs guests didn’t expect tangled lights wire sex orgy party.
  • Flirty Christmas mistletoe drinking at pub asks mistletoe sprig shouldn’t you be under me dirty pick-up line.