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Pg 131 of 132

1992-03-03

Two cats on date, one cat thinks the other is embarrassing because he ordered white wine with gerbils.
1992-03-02

Three Tupperware containers sit on furniture while wives are out, and they are all making their lids burp with food and cans scattered everywhere.
1992-02-26

Fish parents tell daughter when she comes in door she can't deny it, they know she's been out with piranha, daughter has bite in body.
1992-02-15

Woman thanks man for bone china, says he put so much of himself into it, man lies on floor implying he has no bones.
1992-02-06

Man wonders if there is any hope since he met another girl who won't give him time of day, girl's wearing several clocks and watches.
1992-01-31

Man thinks about date, he complimented service, asked for another date, showed her food on his dental floss, wonders why she got sick and left.
1992-01-28

Bottle of wine at dating service, tells employee the girl for him should be complex, yet simple, smooth with character, delicate body, and bold.
1992-01-24

Dorothy tells Dereck they haven't been dating, she's been researching a scientific study on undesirable men, she's done now, another researcher will follow up sometime.
1992-01-14

Wife doesn't understand why husband's cat allergies bother him when cats are locked in other room, fails to see cat hair covering everything.
1992-01-13

One fruit fly tells another to take a long walk on a short pear, instead of pier because they are tiny fruit flies.
1991-11-27

Wayne the caterpillar isn't enjoying his high school reunion because everyone else has turned into butterflies, but not him.
1990-01-02

Woman is now able to focus anger on boyfriend instead of self and feels relief.