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  • Larry the Cable Guy vs. Lawrence the Cable Gentleman.
  • Elf questions his choice of college major when seeing a garden gnome headed to work.
  • The poetry of Father John Misty isn't a good fit for Hallmark.
  • Due to short-staffing, cop has to be both good cop and bad cop to suspect during interrogation.
  • Not equal pyramid chores; cleaning the basement vs attic.
  • Author of Having Patience keeps readers waiting to get signed book.
  • Emojis get together at the Emoti-con convention.
  • Ed stopped using speakerphone after being misheard by colleagues.
  • Rosie the Riveted robot parodies WW2 Rosie the Riverter icon.
  • Harold regrets scheduling his surgery on take-your-child-to-work-day.
  • Heart organs comment that perfect heart had to have had plastic surgery to be so well shaped.
  • Tree identifies snowman that stole branches in police line up.