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A baby thinks a woman's nursing degree took way too long because he learned to nurse in 4 minutes.
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A girl is disgusted to find out she has microorganisms living in her nose, but the microorganisms are even more grossed out.
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A chicken going to Perdue thinks he's going to college.
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A woman checks the dictionary for spelling, but thinks she spelled words upside-down because she's holding the dictionary upside-down.
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Skunk philosophy is "I stink, therefore I am."
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A student in a philosophy class accidentally brings Play-Dough instead of Plato.