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Marie Antoinette tries to become a dietician, but she lets her clients eat cake.
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Godzilla and his wife eat golf courses to get more greens.
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A woman keeps pushing her diet back until after the holidays, but once the holidays end her Girl Scout cookies arrive.
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Godzilla needs to stop eating Mercury cars.
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A godzilla eats shieks for breakfast and lunch.
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Godzilla's wife nags him for eating too much starch when he eats a laundromat.
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A man eating a low fat snack only has fat on the lower half of his body.
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Different foods in stomach are told exactly where to go, with carrots headed for the eyes, milk to the bones, and cake to the butt.
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At a doggie dinner party, one dog agrees to a helping of cat because he is cutting down on saturated cats, rather than saturated fats.
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Doctor tells patient according to tests, his diet is butterflies, bees, horseflies, and dragonflies, while patient makes mental note close mouth when riding bike.
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Famous last words from Charles Darwin, Thomas Edison, Leonardo Da Vinci, and Albert Bugleweed, whose last words were "Honey, how's your diet going'".
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Wife tells husband, Albert, that expandability is a good feature for computers, not husbands, just as he has his mouth open extremely wide to eat an entire piece of cake.
