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Man asks President Garfield’s empty desk in White House Oval Office what he thinks of Mondays.
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Principal at Charlie Brown’s school tells slide trombone instrument teacher students can’t understand her voice.
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Stick figure doodle says creator demands a sacrifice as pencil erases another stick figure.
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Woman reads sleeping on stomach is unhealthy on medical website while turtle on laptop reads sleeping on back is unhealthier.
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Cat in carrier with scratched owner wonders if it will get a longer sentence for resisting arrest.
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Flower on smartphone sees showers expected weather forecast as dog walks up behind.
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Exhausted mother in art museum with unruly kids thinks Whistler’s Mother painting is unrealistic because she’s sitting down.
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Cat parent scolds kitten child at dinner table for finishing all its food.
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Man in electric car asks woman to stop posting online that he’s passing gas while driving past stations.
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Glass of water confesses sins to water purifier pitcher priest in church confessional.
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Bored whale watching TV thinks killer whale is predictable murder suspect on whodunnit mystery show.
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Shopper birds pushing grocery carts catch worms at Whole Foods parody supermarket.
