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  • Man reads list of red ink altered New Year resolutions changed to dogs’ wants as dog naps with marker.
  • Santa’s smartphone fitness app says his Body Mass Index is bowl full of jelly.
  • Large potted house plant is discouraged it wont fit into smaller pots in closet again.
  • Toilet paper congratulates smaller TP roll for weight loss but it says it’s not sure it was worth it.
  • Vampire at restaurant tells date he tried going vegan but you can’t squeeze blood from a turnip.
  • Cat teacher shows cat students nutrition pyramid refusing all food groups.
  • One Zilla monster asks another eating a chocolate factory if it broke it’s New Year’s Resolution already.
  • Fat witch regrets eating a whole gingerbread house.
  • Hermit crab emerges from Weight Watchers with small shell.
  • Kevin sees a zombie who wants to eat more humans.
  • Vertical Mummy Wrap is Figure Flattering.
  • House hunters disagree on amenities.


You searched for: diet