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Online dating woman matches with man likes long hikes but disappointed plays football.
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Owner mad guilty dogs chewed shoes but helpful pets solved her painful high heels problem.
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Customer orders misspelled paper stationary bicycle instead of stationery exercise bike.
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Green traffic signal lights E.T.s tell alien in UFO contact with crashed Earth drivers in accident didn’t go well.
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Barista gives cafe customers in face masks coffees with mumbled names cups.
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Chipmunk at dinner tells embarrassed chipmunk store food in face cheeks not rear end.
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Snake eating egg at table tells other snake it was supposed to unhinge it’s jaw, not front door off hinges.
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Man tells birdwatcher watching Sesame Street Berts in trees he thought they were going birdwatching.
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Woman on date asks man his relationship goals and he says “know intimacy” but she hears “no” and leaves.
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An umpire says he's going to work at home.
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Ted thought he was asked to bring his stripper pole, not his striper fishing pole.
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Bad cell phone signal makes a man think a woman is inviting him over for a sexy roleplay, when really she's breaking up with him.