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Wife doesn't understand why husband's cat allergies bother him when cats are locked in other room, fails to see cat hair covering everything.
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One fruit fly tells another to take a long walk on a short pear, instead of pier because they are tiny fruit flies.
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Woman in shower calls into work, tells boss she's enjoying her shower too much, she can't make it in before 10:30.
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Employees at a meeting to improve productivity, one employee suggests skipping these kind of meetings and instead start doing some work.
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Advertisement for Birthday Go-Away, a medicine that guarantees to keep birthdays away, only apply once a year, you never age another day, dial 1-900-DREAM ON.
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Dentist tells patient he has to remove 3 teeth, they can take care of it without making another appointment, dentist takes boxing gloves from nurse.
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Judge tells jury to disregard phone word-balloon prosecution is holding over defendant's head, balloon says, "I'm guilty."
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Sleepy man tells wife souvenir wind chimes from New York wasn't the best idea because chimes are clinking and being rude to each other.
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Doctor tells injured pillow lying on bed with Band-Aids and IV to cool it with the pillow fights for a while.
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The Invisible Man at Comedy Night makes a joke, saying "That was no laundry, that was my wife," implying invisible wife got washed.
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Attorney tells Tooth Fairy 37 years ago, he neglected client's tooth, they ask for 25 cents plus compounded monthly interest and pain, suffering, mental anguish.
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Edgar the capital E lies on beach chair, postal worker delivers royalty check because Edgar posed for the top of the eye chart.
