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Martha Stewart told the doctor who delivered her to save her umbilical cord to make into a meaningful wall hanging.
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Product failures chunky pulp milk, caffeinated baby formula, salty Dr Pepper soda, Lee Press-On nose hair, sugar sweet toothpaste, stinky tuna Chicken of the Sea fish perfume, spicy cajun Preparation-H, gross leftover parts chicken soup, vegetable flavor popsicles & feline sleeping pills for insomniac cats.
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A baby speaks in pig Latin because he's scared the room is bugged with a baby monitor.
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A woman thinks a baby smiling is just gas, but a man who gets gas all the time doesn't believe her.
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An alarm clock feels obsolete when a family's new baby wakes them up.
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A cat threatens to wake up a woman's baby if she doesn't give him some fish.
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A baby conehead is born with a round head.
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A baby only sleeps, eats, and poops, so cats think it might be another cat.
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A baby sues a doctor for slapping his butt when he was born.
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A man wishes he could hear his new baby's thoughts, but the baby is hoping he doesn't inherit his dad's nose.
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A new mom ink bottle can't tell if her kid is a girl or a boy, but she has an inkling.