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Single wine glass at bar tells martini margarita is cute but can’t get past salt flake dandruff flaw dating deal breaker.
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Single boulder on cellphone dating website rejects pushy looking Greek myth Sisyphus photo in bad first impression.
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Uncomfortable optician employee feels watched by oppressive eyeglasses shop display frames crowd.
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Longer buttons style snowman says he preferred untucking shirts to short button snow man.
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Disgusting St Patricks Day Irish eyes Looky Charms parody eyeballs breakfast cereal package is magically dilated.
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Security kitty at boarding gate metal detector says needs to go inside air passenger’s bag.
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Iphone in bed prefers scroll phone husband’s screen to Brad Pitt picture before sex.
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Delivered box embarrassed driver tagged proof of delivery photos on social media.
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Black cat tells stressed lighter colored cat with dark tipped tail it looks drained.
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Flirting cellphone hits on smartphone crush at bar, says can’t stop looking at it.
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Home tells wrinkled rundown house it needs a little foundation to improve appearance.
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Business man with arms and legs poking out inside body is subject of an internal investigation.
