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Giant turtle, after swallowing man, scares workers away by asking them if guy looks good in a turtleneck, and man is visible inside turtle's throat.
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Hal stares out window of a Used Q-Tip store, wondering where he went wrong because other stores offer used cars, used furniture, and used clothes.
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Two traffic lights in front of automobile accident, one signal light says to other she doesn't care whose turn it was, red isn't her color.
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Snail without a shell passes two shelled snails, one snail says to the other that he thought streaking went out in the '70s.
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Man takes hanger out of closet, hanger begs him not to hang up the tacky polyester suit because he has a big date tonight.
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Sock at Missing Persons Etc. reporting mate missing, describes him as her size with stripes like her, says she last saw him in rinse cycle.
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The Invisible Man at Comedy Night makes a joke, saying "That was no laundry, that was my wife," implying invisible wife got washed.
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Laundry inside washer talk about how fun wash cycle was, especially spin cycle, shirt upset because he missed out since he was inside out.
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Husband tells wife about "undo" feature on computer, wishes life had same feature for if something gets broken, cheat on wife, say something stupid.
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A pen will get in trouble for leaking ink on someone's pocket instead of on paper.
