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Xmas mall Santa Claus tells women when asleep wool blanket makes her sweat & drools laying on stomach.
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Bright red light nose Rudolph mixes up wrong Christmas gift color, only sees pink.
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Optometrist tests patient eyesight reading menus in dark restaurants lighting.
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Embarrassed cat tells Mickey Mouse ear hat wearing cat to think of the optics paired together.
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Upside down bat parent checked above scared bat child’s branch & says no monsters over bed to reassure bedtime fears.
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Single wine glass at bar tells martini margarita is cute but can’t get past salt flake dandruff flaw dating deal breaker.
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Single boulder on cellphone dating website rejects pushy looking Greek myth Sisyphus photo in bad first impression.
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Uncomfortable optician employee feels watched by oppressive eyeglasses shop display frames crowd.
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Disgusting St Patricks Day Irish eyes Looky Charms parody eyeballs breakfast cereal package is magically dilated.
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Security kitty at boarding gate metal detector says needs to go inside air passenger’s bag.
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Iphone in bed prefers scroll phone husband’s screen to Brad Pitt picture before sex.
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Delivered box embarrassed driver tagged proof of delivery photos on social media.
