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  • Web site Muskets.com takes a long time to load, like a musket.
  • Dog likens owner's return home to being rescued from a deserted island.
  • Snowman wife puts husband's head in roof hole after his promises to fix it go unfilled.
  • Complex rules for opening bathroom door are product of video game addict architect.
  • Construction worker climbs tall ladder before foundation is even laid.
  • Inmate wonders when his cell mate's long run-on sentences will be over.
  • Dog marks all his friends' walls on Facebook.
  • The line at a signing for "Put Yourself First" is a fight because everyone's trying to put themselves first.
  • Mothers misses Thanksgiving with family because she is camped out at Black Friday's Christmas sales.
  • Mother calls tech support to adjust her baby and pets' internal clocks, which don't recognize daylight savings.
  • The Grim Reaper's new tool, the Swiss Army Scythe, has every tool possible.
  • A kid says he wants a Dove bar, but he swears so his mom washes his mouth out with Dove soap.


You searched for: impatient