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Forgetful dog failed New Year’s stop chewing things goal before it finished writing torn paper resolutions list.
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Environmentally friendly dog writes list of more walks, eat garbage, poop plant fertilizer conservation plans.
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Man on smartphone tracks daily emotional progress on therapy baby steps pedometer wellness app.
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After slipping on fruit peel, injured man in science lab’s life mission is to invent peel-less bananas.
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Angry man fails writing misspelled New Year’s resolution plan to be more patient.
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Pumpkin fortuneteller predicts pumpkin approached by carving knife will lose weight.
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Psychologist tells groundhog therapy will help his shadow fears as scary clowns sneak up behind him.
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Colored paint splatters cover pranked man’s face and clothes in paintball pinball game joke.
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Woman on date asks man his relationship goals and he says “know intimacy” but she hears “no” and leaves.
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Man reads list of red ink altered New Year resolutions changed to dogs’ wants as dog naps with marker.
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Annoyed snake with smartphone fitness tracker app sees zero steps yesterday and today.
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Cat’s fitness tracker smart watch shows he slept 23 hours, just missing goal of 24.
