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A vampire drools a lot when watching an accident on the news.
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The inside workings of a toddler's brain.
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A woman keeps pushing her diet back until after the holidays, but once the holidays end her Girl Scout cookies arrive.
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A fish thinks her date stood her up, but he's really trapped in a whale's spout.
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Husband apologizes to wife for coming home late, says he hit every red light on the way, car has several traffic signals stuck to front.
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Woman in shower calls into work, tells boss she's enjoying her shower too much, she can't make it in before 10:30.
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Assembly plant has difficulty fitting satellite dishes in cars for satellite radio.