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Product failures chunky pulp milk, caffeinated baby formula, salty Dr Pepper soda, Lee Press-On nose hair, sugar sweet toothpaste, stinky tuna Chicken of the Sea fish perfume, spicy cajun Preparation-H, gross leftover parts chicken soup, vegetable flavor popsicles & feline sleeping pills for insomniac cats.
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A lizard tells her husband that she wants to have kids while they're still young enough to eat them.
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A doctor can't find Houdini in his mother's womb.
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An alien reads a trashy newspaper that writes about humans the way human tabloids write about aliens.
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Nude Descending Staircase artist Duchamp’s baby drawing of father’s trip falling down stairs isn’t appreciated.
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A baby speaks in pig Latin because he's scared the room is bugged with a baby monitor.
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A mom slinky is proud because her kid went down the stairs by himself.
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A praying mantis baby gets scared because his mom is going to eat him.
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A snake kid helps his mom make dinner by helping her strangle a man.
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A lazy cat dad puts a sign for free kittens out in his yard.
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A woman accidentally gives her husband milk and her baby coffee, making her baby bounce off the walls with energy.
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A baseball dad tells his kid it's time for a change-up when he smells his diaper.