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  • Nerdy complex carbs don't mix well with stupid simple proteins.
  • A woman hands out lint rollers for guests to use as they leave her cat-filled house.
  • King Richard III trades his kingdom for a horse.
  • Apples think they can hear the theme from Jaws because people are bobbing for them.
  • Candles on a birthday cake are about to have a bad hair day.
  • A man with no legs wonders how the other half lives.
  • Construction concrete blocks socialize, with one introducing himself as "very supportive," another looking for a "concrete relationship," and another eyeing the "hard body" of a cinder block.
  • One woman compliments another's hip dress, while the woman wonders if she should confess that the pattern is actually spilled punch.
  • Birthday cake tackles man because he came after him with a knife.
  • Wife tells husband that she said mingle, not mangle because he is holding another guest in the air by the throat.
  • Pencil at party meets another pencil, thinks he's too short, kinda dull because his lead isn't sharp, and has worst toupee, a cap eraser.
  • Fish two days after the Boston Tea Party, and the tea being dumped in the water, are telling each other how they are wired up.


You searched for: parties