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  • Consumer police reports of abusing travel mugs, garden shovels, gps, and terms and conditions.
  • Bird wants to get a contractor to build a house instead of building their own nest.
  • Caveman wants to borrow neighbor's tools as soon as they are invented.
  • To encourage usage of website, customer service offers embarrassing phone option.
  • Relative sees brother-in-law sold in tool department and say this proves he's a tool.
  • Guilt-free mower runs on solar while guilt-ridden mower runs on grass screams.
  • Prince applies caffeinated lip balm in hopes of waking up Sleeping Beauty.
  • A cat tries to blow-dry a bird's nest out of a snowman.


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