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The Cookie Monster cheats on his diet by eating asparagus.
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Pinocchio chips his love handles off with a hammer and chisel.
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Salespeople are supposed to ask their clients about themselves, so a man asks if his client has always been fat and dumpy.
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Cats go into a catgut tennis racket factory to lose weight.
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A jar of peanut butter's husband was smooth when she married him, but now he's chunky.