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  • Couple creep past sleeping dog with huge tail, and the man says not to wake him because if he gets excited, they are both goners.
  • One fowl says since Gregory was cremated, he feels like he is with him - and there is a can of cream of chicken on the mantel.
  • Scientist holding genetically altered skunk tells boss that it sprays deodorant and is a good gift for people that neglect personal hygiene.
  • Giraffe runs away from three lions left holding his Velcro spots in their paws and mouths.
  • List includes skunk, clogged toilet, permed hair, nail polish, and permed skunk that won't unclog toilet until nails dry.
  • Woman explains her half cat-half reptile pet because her lease only allowed one pet, so she and Jim compromised by having their pets combined.
  • Police officer suspects a copy-cat killing when he finds a dead feline on a copy machine with copies of the cat laying on the floor.
  • Girl's dog and cats sitting with her friend, she tells friend her pets love her, friend says she wants to be veterinarian, pets run away.
  • One chicken tells another that his fried chicken leg is an old high school injury in Home Economics class.
  • Man tells friend that snakes feeling slimy is a myth, not seeing that snake swallowed friend, and friend thinks snakes feel slimy from the inside.
  • Felicia the cat plans her day, including sleep, trigonometric equations, developing theorems, eating, long division, and sleep, each activity in different positions.
  • Wife gives husband present, hopes he likes it because she had help picking it out, gift is a dead mouse, cat is at wife's feet.


You searched for: animal