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  • Nurse suctioning incision sucks patient's face from the inside.
  • Alien that doctor finds in baby is Dad's Star Wars figurines.
  • A patient getting a tummy tuck asks his surgeon to read him a bedtime story once he's tucked in.
  • Embarrassing text goes to city street ticker instead of doctor.
  • Patient cannot get insurance coverage for his preexisting conniption.
  • Cat claims it is not fat but simply startled.
  • Cookie monster puppeteer has high cholesterol in hand from cookies.
  • Doctor thinks baby looks like a cross between an alien and an ant while using a Rorschach inkblot ultrasound test.

  • Patient told not to awaken sleep-walking surgeon coming at him with a knife.
  • Nurses scare patients with chainsaws to check their active blood pressure rates.
  • Steven Wright's low-key personality is poor match for endorsing energy pills.
  • Surgeons suggest not using confetti in the operating room for New Year's Celebration.


You searched for: health