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A turkey has plastic surgery to get her wattle removed.
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A female deciduous tree says her pine tree husband doesn't understand what it's like when her leaves change in autumn.
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Quasimodo became a hunchback because he sat at the computer looking at porn instead of getting up and stretching.
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A baby thinks his dad needs a drool bib while watching women's volleyball and Baywatch.
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A woman can't think of a reason not to go out with a man, but when he calls later she'll have had time to find one.
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A caterpillar's date goes upstairs to change and takes forever because she's turning into a butterfly.
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A pregnant woman wishes her husband could be pregnant so she could do errands.
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Fashions to attract men include bikinis, football costumes, and pizza costumes.
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A store for confident women sells ugly clothing.
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Zoo worker tells woman her husband was eaten by alligators, and she reacts with shock, but pleased because she will look good dressed in black.
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A man and woman walk alone, holding hands, and the woman believes the man is thinking about romance when he's actually thinking about The Simpsons.
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Man on one knee proposing to girlfriend opens ring box to reveal a ringworm - a ring with a worm coming out of it.