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A woman's polite response to a rude text depends on which finger she uses.
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A jellyfish's tentacles look shorter because he was in cold water.
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Out of ideas, John Quinones asks people why they didn't bless stranger after sneezing.
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Submissive masochist clicks on "submit" button on website.
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A dog gets excited when he hears the word "walk" in boardwalk while playing Monopoly.
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Computer's slow connection is responsible for slow response to question.
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Butt dialing evolves until the butt actually answers the call as well.
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Derek's plant is holding Tic-Tacs and Certs because Derek likes to talk to his plants, implying that his breath is bad.