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  • Summer autocorrected sunken sand castle, surfing pig surf board, guilt confessing concession stand & balding hair head volleyball.
  • Tired wife with morning coffee & bathrobe on dock not a mooring person as sunken boat drifts away frustrating mad husband.
  • Expired older Humpty Dumpty apologizes to surprised lover for disappointing sexual performance with past best by dates excuse.
  • Veggies denying child refuses to eat dinner vegetables, tells mother he has asparagus hesitancy.
  • Robot in driverless car pulled over tells police it can’t see crosswalks or traffic lights unsafe driving excuse.
  • Cat destroying couch tells owner not to listen to fake news.
  • Flower bartender tells daisy drinking light beers isn’t how photosynthesis works.
  • Overweight nutcracker eating doughnuts tells other nutcracker they count as nuts.
  • Turtle caught hugging other turtle tells angry wife excuse he’s becoming a home inspector.
  • Lazy people have lots of excuses for not working out at spin class.
  • Teenager tells dad he's not brushing his teeth because he is seasoning them.
  • Tried but nothing got clean parodies Tide laundry detergent.


You searched for: excuses