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Adam eats fruit instead of being fruitful with Eve.
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A man calls for his dog, Fat Moron Pig, and gets beat up.
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A snake's mom and a kid's mom tell them not to touch each other.
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A fish thinks her date stood her up, but he's really trapped in a whale's spout.
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A company tries to hire someone with skills in construction, but a snake applies because he's good at constriction.
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A wolf thinks 3 megabytes of RAM is like three bites out of a ram.
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A man asks for the most popular table in a restaurant, and people climb on it while he's trying to eat.
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A woman says she doesn't want a one-night stand, so a man thinks they'll have a two-night stand.
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Wife sneezes twice, so one man tells friend that she sneezes in pairs, while friend worries about the pears in the fruit bowl.
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Girl finds genie in bottle, asks how many wishes she gets, genie can't say, she asks for ballpark figure, genie turns her body into baseball field.
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A student in a philosophy class accidentally brings Play-Dough instead of Plato.